Getting engaged means you’re ready to commit to each other. Getting engaged: “How do we envision our future together?” “Or should we be putting a little bit extra into the joint account … and if things go wrong, we split the savings 50/50?”Īnd there’s one more scenario you shouldn’t neglect to discuss: What happens to your shared belongings if you break up? This issue can feel especially awkward to raise, but imagine how much more difficult it would be to work out when you’re no longer a couple. “Are we agreeing to save a certain amount and then spend the rest as we wish?” said Voisin. It also prompts you to have the conversation about how you’re going to allocate your money. Voisin said that if you’re comfortable with it, opening a joint checking or savings account can help you get used to managing money as a couple. These are things you can sell to raise money for a wedding or to help pay down debt,” said Smith. What will you each keep? What will you sell, toss or donate to make room for this new person in your life? “If you both are living in separate places, you probably have two washers, two dryers, two TVs. Navigating this relationship milestone requires a ton of compromise.
Adorable quirks can transform into irritating habits. The moving-in stage is often the ultimate test of a relationship. Moving in together: “What’s mine, yours and ours?” In fact, the more transparent you are with each other about your savings, debt and overall financial health, the better you will understand what your future as a couple might look like and what part you’ll each play in it. It’s best to put that information on the table early. She pointed out that if you eventually want to get a house or apartment together (more on that below), your credit scores will inevitably come to light. “We definitely need to bring up the big C-word, credit,” said Smith. This can serve as a good jumping-off point to dig deeper into each other’s financial pictures. She recommended sharing with each other your proudest accomplishments as well as your money mistakes or regrets. “Talking about financial successes and failures is important,” said Voisin. Whatever “serious” means to you, be sure to have a serious conversation about your current financial situation too. You might be exchanging I-love-yous after three months or waiting to make things exclusive several years into dating. When things get serious: “How do our financial lives compare?” “Ask them, ‘If you won the lottery, what would you do?’ I think that tells you a lot about a person,” she said.įor instance, would they give some of the money to charity? Invest in property? Blow it all on cars and parties? The answer could tell you enough to know whether date No.
Talking about family, parents and how you were raised - you can get an idea from there.”Įrin Voisin, a CFP and the director of financial planning at EP Wealth Advisors in Torrance, California, suggested playing the lottery game as an icebreaker. “I also think people’s attitude about money comes from their family. “Do they do things that are irrational or impulsive?” asked Reshell Smith, a certified financial planner and the founder of Ames Financial Solutions in Orlando, Florida. The same goes for finances.Īt this point in your prospective relationship, you don’t have to ask about money point-blank. Usually it’s best to tread lightly when bringing up more serious topics, such as marriage and kids. The first few dates are about feeling each other out and seeing if there’s a connection.
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